echoes you hear

It's 3pm, on a lazy Saturday afternoon and the Sun's about to set and the only thing I can think of is this change- the change I've been through the past few months. The Sun goes back and emerges the same way every day. It goes home, unlike me. Setting foot in this new, cold country was challenging, obviously. Leaving so much behind, it was more than just starting a new phase in my life. Sleeping without Theo was tough, not seeing familiar faces in the morning was tough. Finding out that cereals are actually quite expensive was tough. I remember the first day- I cut myself while opening a package and not having packed bandages, I cried at the thought of having to manage my life with my useless self. Not knowing how to cook and never having done laundry, I'd traveled miles away from home thinking it was all about getting a better education. It was not. It was about changing my life altogether. At first, it was relieving to see brown faces. It gave me bursts of joy...

I haven't read a book in the last 3 years as far as I can recall. It's really sad because at one point, instead of investing my time in video games, I'd thrive on books. However, I decided to start a book called 'The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck' and this time, I plan on finishing it. I highly recommend this book, by the way. It's awesome. As much as this book teaches me to save my fucks and not to give too much of a fuck to anything, I have too much time in hand and too many fucks left to give, so here's my rant. I live in a country where reading about rape cases has become a regular thing. And there are some cases which are just.. bewildering. In the wildest of one's dreams wouldn't one be able to imagine such a mishap happening. Major channels have stopped covering these stories because  who cares? Another day, another story.  I live in a country where the current government is failing on its commitment to win the trust of ...

i shut my eyes only to see you not let go of my hand not to walk away either but for you to come close and fade away as you do   scared, i wake up only to find that the nights are longer than before do you remember the times when we'd be up watching the night sky its still the same except i feel scared now you had a face right out of the stories i'd read now you look just like anyone i'm afraid, am i too young to sit on an armchair or too old to get stoned? they say time heals everything but as i watch the clock strike 12 i wait for you to call (again) only to realise its been ages since you last did looking at a picture of us, i lay down with ease, thinking about everything that's broke as i leave it to the breeze. ~Peace.

I’m afraid to take the extra mile. When I walk onto the playground, I still see the 4 year old me hesitating to climb the half-moon climber as he’s too afraid to fall. When I cross the school gate, I still see the 6 year old me clinging onto my mother’s hand, so that she doesn’t send him to school. When I hang out with my friends, I still see the 8 year old me, sitting in one corner of the room, too shy to talk to anyone. Trying to cross that frail bridge connecting two banks of a river has never been easy for me. I’d stand for days and stare at the other end, wondering how things would be there. Perhaps, I wouldn’t be afraid to fall. Perhaps, I could let go off my mother’s hand. Perhaps, I could approach the girl I was dying to talk to.   Fast forward 18 years, and I find myself on the other side of the river. When I look back, I can see myself taking the first step- afraid to take a step forward. However, I decide to hold on. I also see myself making my way halfway a...