Vexations #4

"..they can't avoid the truth, that being young is so painful, it's almost, like, too much to feel."

My mum always told me to pour my heart out. In everything I do, in every person I confide. "If you're not going to put your heart and soul into it, might as well not do it", she used to say. As I grew up, however, I realized most people were not brought up in the same manner. Or they chose not to be so. 

Often I'm told that I'm too much. My ex told me that once. "You're too much for me right now, and I'm not in a place to handle it", she said. I hear that a lot, actually. They're always along the same lines. Be a man/ Why are you so sensitive/ Why do you feel so much. 

And often, I wonder. Aren't these the same people who love watching movies like The Notebook, YJHD (my white folks, don't worry, it's an Indian movie), The Fault in Our Stars? Aren't these the same people who listen to Ed Sheeran's Photograph, or Kodaline's All I want? Aren't these the same people who feel that rush, that electricity running through their veins when each of them met their first love? 

Why do we, as humans, bash others for feeling too much, when we do it ourselves more often than we realize? Let me rephrase that last part- ..when we do it ourselves more often than we realize, when no one's watching. 

"To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die"

It's tragic that the world has a stereotype of men which makes men like me think twice before sharing and opening up. Do you ever wonder why your food waste bin smells so awful? It's simple- the more you store within, and the longer you do so, the more you rot. 

Let's normalize guys sharing their feelings. Let's not label it as being girly, or being too sensitive. And if you come across someone who says that, be proud. Be proud to be girly, because it's awesome. 

Imagine being a tall, six-packed lad with a brick instead of a heart. Ew.

"To have a heart is to be human, and to be human is to share."

-Peace.